France and Ireland close to war ??
 

Ok, sorry if this was posted before or if it's old as Christ. Also, not meant as a flame....just to get a chuckle.


WAR BETWEEN IRELAND AND FRANCE AVERTED

Jacques Chirac, The French Prime Minister, was sitting in his office
wondering what kind of mischief he could perpetrate against the United
States when his telephone rang.

"Hallo, Mr. Chirac!", a heavily accented voice said. "This is Paddy down at
the Harp Pub in County Sligo, Ireland. I am ringing to inform you that we
are officially declaring war on you!"

"Well, Paddy," Chirac replied, "This is indeed important news! How big is
your army?"

"Right now," said Paddy, after a moment's calculation, "there
is myself, me cousin Sean, me next door neighbor Seamus, and the entire
dart team from the pub. That makes eight!"

Chirac paused. "I must tell you, Paddy, that I have one hundred thousand
men in my army waiting to move on my command."

"Begorra!" said Paddy. "I'll have to ring you back!"



Sure enough, the next day, Paddy called again. "Mr. Chirac, the war is
still on. We have managed to get us some infantry equipment!"

"And what equipment would that be, Paddy?" Chirac asked.
"Well, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and Murphy's farm tractor."

Chirac sighed, amused. "I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 6,000 tanks
and 5,000 armored personnel carriers. Also, I've increased my army to one
hundred fifty thousand since we last spoke."

"Saints preserve us!" said Paddy. "I'll have to get back to you."



Sure enough, Paddy rang again the next day. "Mr. Chirac, the war is still on!"
We have managed to get ourselves airborne! We've modified Jackie
McLaughlin's ultra-light with a couple of shotguns in the cockpit, and
four boys from the Shamrock Pub have joined us as well!"

Chirac was silent for a minute and then cleared his throat.
"I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 100 bombers and 200 fighter planes.
My military complex is surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile
sites. And since we last spoke, I've increased my army to two hundred thousand!"

"Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!", said Paddy, "I'll have to ring you back."



Sure enough, Paddy called again the next day. "Top o' the mornin',
Mr. Chirac! I am sorry to tell you that we have had to call off the war."

"I'm sorry to hear that," said Chirac. "Why the sudden change of heart?"

"Well," said Paddy, "We've all had a long chat over a bunch of pints, and
decided there's no foo-kin way we can feed two hundred thousand prisoners

LMFAO GREAT!

LOL, thats pretty good, i've heard basicly the same thing only it was Afghanistan vs USA or something freak:

[quote:10e60]Jacques Chirac, The French Prime Minister, was sitting in his office
wondering what kind of mischief he could perpetrate against the United
States.........[/quote:10e60]


LMFAO

LMAO!!

what is an irishmens 7 course meal?







































a six pack and a potato!

gervis?

GERV4PREZ

ROFL...

Gerv in a bag.

The original version of this was the irish guy phoning saddam in iraq.

gerv in a can. oOo:

[quote="@/\/G3L":a12fe]gerv in a can. oOo:[/quote:a12fe]

Nein.

[img]http://www.movv.com/prvupload/uploads/gervinabag.jpg[/img]

Ive yet to see how thats "funny" in any way. Just looks oOo:

so you're basicly calling the french cowards ?

its cause your irish, an irishman in a bag.

[quote="Scalping Chief":ed077]its cause your irish, an irishman in a bag.[/quote:ed077]

Like i said


oOo:

[quote=geRV]Like i said


oOo:[/quote:b39af]
rock:

rofl, dude thats some funny shit

Gerv - Life in a Bag

Gerv=Lump

happy:

[quote="Short Hand":03f5a]so you're basicly calling the french cowards ?[/quote:03f5a]

who is?... and aren't they?...

[quote="Scalping Chief":21276]its cause your irish, an irishman in a bag.[/quote:21276]
hahahaha

[quote="Short Hand":f4bea]so you're basicly calling the french cowards ?[/quote:f4bea]

Brilliant deduction Holmes.

The French under Napolean would fuck you up though.

rock: rofl

Kinda like they did Wellington at Waterloo? oOo:

Napoleon was a fucking moron.

your a moron for saying that.

[quote="Short Hand":ecd94]your a moron for saying that.[/quote:ecd94]
anyone that tries to fight the russians in russia with winter coming is a Moron.

nunavut would own russia with their polar bears

[quote="Pick Axe":be657][quote="Short Hand":be657]your a moron for saying that.[/quote:be657]
anyone that tries to fight the russians in russia with winter coming is a Moron.[/quote:be657]


yes im sure in early 1800's this was on every generals mind. rolleyes: Scorched earth didn't even exist yet, it was not even thought of to be even a possibility.

napoleon was a fucking genious. I dont care what you say. If your that small of a person yet you can still get an entire country to follow you and go out and take over the world. the nholy shit your awsome.

Honestly, who gives a fuck?

I really dont

fuck you gay....?